This post is a continuation of part 1 found here.
So I started my journey back to school, to begin a new phase and chapter in my life. Not knowing where it would lead, but having faith in myself … and deciding that life wasn’t worth it if I couldn’t be happy living it. My first year back proved smooth sailing. I was reminded how smart I actually am, how much knowledge, depth and experience I’d amassed over time, and learning just how capable I was. I continued developing my self and seeking truth, while jumping between school, work, and parenting. Then one day about a little over a year into my new studies, I stumble across an audio-book. Again, seeking insight on developing myself into a ‘success’ etc… The book’s title was hidden, simply labeled “Warning!! Do not play! This will change your life”… or something to that affect. I decided to bite the bait, gave it a listen, and after hours upon hours of absorbing its info… my mind was literally blown.
I had an awakening experience that can only be described as my head being cracked open and all the things I’d ever learned came flying out. All of life experiences up to that point, all academic learning, arts, sciences, mathematics, etc… it all flew out of me. As I sat in awe i could feel the various contents that had been kept in nice little compartments that made sense, suddenly mix with the contents of all I just learned from the text. Resorting itself, new insights and understandings being formed and this swarming cloud of knowledge floating above my head being sucked back into my mind like bolt of lightning… in a way that showed me the inter-connected-ness of ALL. And as much as I hate to admit… I frigging cried… multiple times… for the next few days. Ungh, I know fellas… I’m sorry (SMH) …lol
As crazy as it may sound, that experience truly transformed my life. Not what I would’ve expected from a book titled “Conversations with God” by Neale Donald Walsh. Had I known the title of the book in advance, I would’ve probably mocked and scoffed at it. For someone like myself, having attended catholic school in my youth and raised “Christian”, I’d been exposed to religion early on. However, considering the difficulties of my early life, religion itself never really cut it for me. I recognized the common, universal truths like love for your fellow man and value of such moral guidance, but there were too many contradictions for me to accept. As I grew, I eventually explored Islam and Judaism, reading through much of the Koran and the Torah. Again finding common threads, but yet even more contradictions. From there I went on to learn about the historical polytheistic religions of Greeks and Romans, dabble and Hinduism and eventually settle more recently in line with the teachings of the Dharma more commonly known as Buddhism. That being said, at this point in me life, I was very settled in my own personal belief system, blending the common truths of all but not prescribing to any of the religions. The last thing I was looking for at this time was more religious doctrine. I was fully focused on the power of self to create the life I envisioned. Had I saw the title of the book, I can say for certain I would have passed. And… I would have missed out dearly. For the book itself, despite it’s name was not religious doctrine. But rather an experience with a higher source that the writer had. An experience so palpable and resonating with such truth that I (and apparently millions of others) shared, through the text itself.
As esoteric and impractical as it sounds, it was a profound conscious awakening experience. I call it my “conscious awakening” because now in hindsight, I realize I’ve been awakening all along. Every hardship overcome, every insight learned every epiphany ever had… these were all awakening points in my life. Every time we grow and evolve it’s a progressive step towards awakening to who we really are. The thought then is, are we conscious of that awakening process, as awakening is just a progressive process in my eyes. After that, my world changed… from the holy and esoteric, to the most mundane and practical experiences of life. I carried a profound new awareness and understanding of it all. My relationships at home, with my family, with my son changed as I became a more loving person. My life began to flow with more ease and I found myself learning faster, becoming more abundant and more blessed!
It was amazing … until, I had a stroke. Hah! Go figure, after all of that, and I go and have a stroke! Like seriously?! FML!! LOL!!! At least that’s how I was thinking at the time of my stroke, but it was just another layer, another opportunity for growth and expansion. Through the power of alchemy, I’ve been able to put my life back together and to see yet again in my life… the negative transform into positive. From suffering serious illness that many may consider justifiable reason to give up, I found the opportunity to create the space my life has needed. The space to slow down, focusing things important to me like #CultOfDad and this community and brand platform I am building for fathers. The opportunity to get back on track with school while focusing on my health. The space to help others through private consultation and my healing work. And, the space I needed to remove myself from situations I felt stuck and stagnant in, that were stressing me out, taking all my time and not allowing me to pursue that which I am passionate about or opportunities to build up myself. Its funny how life can work itself out like that… and all I had to do was suffer a minor stroke which I am blessed to be able to recovering from so quickly… with a little effort, perseverance and the urging from my higher-self, that is!
So there you have it, a brief (albeit long-winded) overview of my Spiritual awakening which has led me here. To a place of re-commitment to the vision of Culture of Dad and the building of a platform to address the concerns and needs of Dads from the practical to the esoteric. I hope you enjoyed my story, leave some feedback below, I’d love to hear if any of you have any similar experiences in your journey.